If you’re engaged, you’ve spent a long time planning every detail of your big day. But the night before you walk down the aisle is also a special time to connect with loved ones and make new memories. It’s time to talk about your wedding rehearsal dinner! We’ll go over some common wedding rehearsal dinner questions, ideas, and tips to make planning this evening as seamless as possible.
The Rehearsal Dinner Basics
Traditionally, a rehearsal dinner is a meal held the night before the wedding, where members of the wedding party celebrate after they’ve finished rehearsing the actual step-by-step of the ceremony. They are historically intimate affairs, a time for the people closest to the couple to relax and enjoy a meal together before the big day.
If the families and friends of the couple aren’t as familiar with each other, a wedding rehearsal dinner can be a valuable time for connection since they tend to be a bit more casual, both in dress and venue.
Who Do I Invite to a Rehearsal Dinner?
Typically, a wedding rehearsal dinner is for two categories of guests: members of the wedding party, and out-of-town guests. If someone got on a plane to go to your wedding, then they should probably be invited to the rehearsal dinner. However with the rise of destination weddings, the number of names on the invite list might exceed the number off the list. Couples are increasingly opting for bigger and more casual get togethers as part of a larger wedding weekend.
Whether the guest list is big or small, there’s no need to make specific invites for your rehearsal dinner, especially after putting time and energy into your wedding invitations. Sending an evite or a phone call is perfectly acceptable. Just be sure to inform your guests 4-6 weeks before your wedding rehearsal dinner.
Where Should a Wedding Rehearsal Dinner be Held?
A wedding rehearsal dinner is typically more loose than the next day’s wedding reception, which means your menu of potential location choices is a little bit longer. The rehearsal dinner should be at a location that’s equally or less formal as the ceremony. Consider somewhere with space to move around and mingle, and for casual toasts. If you’re a smaller party, private rooms in a restaurant are a great option. If weather permits, we think that outdoor rehearsals, in a backyard or park, set a perfectly welcoming tone for the weekend. A general rule of thumb is that the location of your rehearsal dinner shouldn’t be more than 45 minutes away from your wedding venue.
How Do I Dress for a Wedding Rehearsal Dinner?
The rehearsal dinner should not be more formal than the wedding itself. Rehearsal dress is typically anywhere from true casual (since you’ll want to be comfortable while rehearsing the ceremony) to semi-formal. Ultimately, of course, it’s whatever best fits in with your event.
Who Organizes the Rehearsal Dinner?
Traditionally, the family of the bride organizes the wedding and the family of the groom organizes the wedding rehearsal dinner. Of course, that’s not a hard-and-fast rule, and assumes a couple of one bride and groom. If the wedding is in one of the family’s hometown, for example, then that family might host a rehearsal dinner as a gesture of appreciation to everyone who travelled. Also, given that the typical wedding costs far more than the typical rehearsal dinner, some couples may wish to split costs more equitably. Ultimately we suggest having a conversation with your partner and each other's families to decide what works best.
Who Gives a Toast at a Rehearsal Dinner?
Night before speeches are usually more casual than the big day. If you are following the tradition of the groom’s family hosting the evening, their mother or father typically give the first speech. If there is someone else hosting, they should give the first toast followed by those who might not get a toast on the day itself. If it’s a smaller rehearsal dinner and the crowd is right, the toasts can be a bit more fun and playful, but of course never mean-spirited—it’s not a roast! As always, use your best judgement.
If you’re reading this guide, your takeaway should be that a wedding rehearsal dinner is a fun, low-stakes event where everyone can loosen up a bit before the big day. With that in mind, here are some of our favorite rehearsal dinner tips.
Take it Outside
If the climate and season of your wedding location allow for it, we’re big fans of a rehearsal dinner in a park or backyard. You’ve got a whole wedding day for formality, so throw on a casual outfit, play some lawn games, and be grateful to be surrounded by your loved ones! Depending on your budget and availability, it’s worth checking to see if your venue has an area that fits the bill.
Foster Community
Since a rehearsal dinner is all about togetherness before the big day, what could be better than a meal with a communal twist? We love concepts like a seafood boil or making your own pasta, where guests from different parts of your life can eat at the same table and, if they’re up for it, make their own food!
No (Professional) Photos, Please
Maybe this is a controversial one, but we love to take photographic matters into our own hands for a wedding rehearsal dinner. You should absolutely hire a reputable professional photographer for all parts of the big day, but we think disposable cameras, and lots of them, are the perfect way to keep things casual and capture the lo-fi glamor of a good rehearsal dinner. Blurry photos? Weird lighting? Since you’re also going to leave with pro photos from the ceremony, it’s no problem!
Maintain the Vibe
Even though it’s more casual, a rehearsal dinner should definitely be an extension of your wedding in theme, colors, and more. One great way to do that is with customized party supplies that showcase your names and wedding artwork! If you’re getting dinner napkins for the day of, pair them with luncheon napkins for your rehearsal. If you’re going to be toasting on your wedding day with champagne flutes, then custom stadium cups are a fun and welcoming option for the night before. It’s all about showing off your vision and telling an unforgettable story
No matter how you style your rehearsal dinner, we want to know about it! Tag us @foryourparty, and happy planning!
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